Hoboken is just a short trip from New York City across the Lincoln or Holland Tunnel. It is a little known hot spot except for those who live in the New York/New Jersey area. It is said that there are more bars and cheesy women in the square mile that makes up Hoboken's downtown than anywhere else in the United States of America, and most of it is on Washington between 1st and 14th! They should've named this town Ho Pokin'! Weekends are the only time to go, when the place is packed with pretty girls from North Jersey and lots of guido types looking for the same thing you are. Beware the big-haired girls in this part of the country, cheesy chicks with low IQ's and hair that will not budge in 40 mile per hour winds. They're everywhere and tend to prefer the, big, Italian kids who drive Iroc Z's and have names like Anthony Carmeniolo Buttafuco Jr. Hoboken Bar and Grill, Bahama Mommas, Nine, Black Bear, 340 Grill, Green Rock, Luiou, the W Hotel lounge, Trinity and Mile Square are all good places. Don't get complacent in this town. You've got to work quickly and early to get the best chicks. This town is fairly non-pretentious, and there are a lot of professional women here. So with any luck, she may actually pick up the check, and you’ll still get laid. Wu!
Women in Phoenix are like the weather here in Arizona, hot as hell. Phoenix is home to Arizona State University, which so generously keeps this city stocked with YP. Like Houston, Phoenix seems like it houses a titty bar on every other corner, although they're not as big as those in Texas— the bars, not the titties! It's very popular for the good-looking female students at ASU to dance part time for extra money. So much so that you can practically assume that most of the hot chicks on campus have at least tried it once. Head to ASU during the school year to check out a little higher education-Arizona style! The place to be on the weekends in Phoenix is Mill Avenue, just to the west of the university. All the bars are lined up back to back. So bar hop or follow the booty into whatever bar suites your fancy. Club 411 and Gibson's on Mill Ave are my personal favorites. For a slightly more mature crowd, check out the areas on the corner of Scottsdale and McDowell Road. Jetz and Stixx on E Street, the Camelback and the Cajun House 5th Ave and The Famous Door on 78th Street are the best bars in this area for the PB in search of hot scamper. Dr. Feel Good and the Blue Note on East McDowell are worth a look-see as are Rio, Iron Horse, Studebakers and Tribecca on Scottsdale. Toolie's on West Thomas Road is an incredible country music club here in Phoenix. (I can't believe I said that.) The only place I've ever been where the bouncers shake your hand, when they card you at the entrance— pretty classy, Garth! The place is packed with hot chicks who love country music. Get out there, if you want to get in there! The best titty bars in the city are Tiffany's by the airport on 32nd and Bourbon Street on Indian School Road. $10US for a table dance- not too shabby for the quality you get. Like Texas and California, there are a good number of pretty Mexican girls here and plenty of great Mexican restaurants in this area to avoid taking them, so that they can keep those cute little bodies as long as possible. On the days you're not at ASU, check out the shopping districts on Colonnade and the Town and Country Mall. West Gate is a relatively new place in Phoenix-- a huge complex full of bars, clubs, restaurants and just adjacent to it-- a titty bar of course.
"Can-cum" is crazy. If beer commercials were real, this would be where they happened. The girls who come here are the ones who take their partying seriously. The beaches are absolutely bad-ass amounts of fun during the day, and there are bikini and wet tee-shirt contests at every club, every night. The girls always start out wearing something, but almost without exception these contests go to the girls who look their best when absolutely naked. Check out Tequila Sunrise, Daddy O's, La Boom and Senior Frogs— but remember, during Spring Break the party moves nightly. Keep your eyes and ears open so as not to miss out. Also check out the Playboy Casino (a $20 one time charge will get you in every night of your trip). It's a little throw back to the days when Playboy and Heffner ruled the earth. The waitresses are from all over the world are all dressed up old school with the bunny ears and everything. There is a strip club here called Platino. The girls there are very international and they can be as platonic or intimate as you want and have the proper financial means for. There is also a second and third Platino location in Playa and Cozumel. One of the bad things about Cancun is that you are under a time constraint with every chick you meet out, unless she's staying in your hotel or one close by. That's because the nightlife is spread out all over town, and the odds of running into a chick who you've already met on a previous night is almost nil. There are just too many spring breakers here. So work quickly and efficiently, lest the booty you work so hard to scam is lost to follow up. The beaches here are beautiful by Mexican standards much like they are in Los Cabos. The ratio can at times be unfavorable, and the chicks often are not as good-looking as those in the Florida or Texas for spring break. But, this is a favorite destination for serious YP. E-muff said. Not to mention that it's a popular destination for major US, South American and European cities due to its large airport, great year-round weather and abundance of hotels and condominiums available for rent. Most anytime of the year there will be hot, YP here on vacation— Americans in March and May, South Americans in January and February and Europeans in July and August.
If you love Asian girls and you are into sex with strangers, this is the country for you. But a stern warning to start off with. Check for an Adam’s Apple! There are lots of “lady boys” here, and some of them can really fool you. “Ground zero” for all the fun is a place called the Nah Nah Hotel in Bangkok. No I am not kidding, it really is called the Nah Nah Hotel and it is chock full of Nah Nah. I had a friend of mine who is an ER doctor from Vegas who literally walked into the bar/night club in this hotel, walked up to a group of girls and pointed to six of them, while shouting “you, you, you, you, you and you come with me”. The quietly got up and in single file, followed him back to the room, where he proceeded to bang all six of the them—two at a time, while the others watched.
Oh and that’s not the crazy part. How about the blow job bars across the street, where literally you can have a drink with your buddy, while some chick (or someone you hope is a chick) is blowing you from a depressed platform under the bar! Too much for me man. Way too much. They’ve got bars here where the ladies are all half naked with numbers buttoned to their string bikinis. If you like one, you tell the waitress the number of the girl you want, she will bring her over, you can talk and get to know her. Then if things really go well, you can “bar fine” her—which is a fee to pay to the house so that she can leave with you. And you can take off for the evening. Oh, and I love the shopping in this place—window shopping that is. You know that scene in Rush Hour 2 when Chris Tucker is visiting Jackie Chan in China and they go to a bar with ladies sitting behind a glass window dressed in lingere—again with numbers buttoned to them—and Tucker is enthusiastically crying out—“Ooo… Ooo… Number 57… no 32… no, no, 16” because he is so excited, he just can’t chose one. Well they have that here too. Yep. After you pick the lady you want, she will take you for a “soapie”. Don’t know what a sopie is? Well, gentlemen—its awesome. You can show up hung over, dirty and exhausted from a night of total debauchery and show up to one of these places and just let her do everything. She will take your clothes off, bath you, wash your hair, trim your fingernails, shave you—then bank you, wash you again and send you on your way—smiling, happy and feeling totally refreshed. The main action is at Soi Cowboy (off Soi 23) or the Nana complex (Soi 4). To avoid wasting the first night, with late arrival, I will go to a hotel within a short walk from one of those places. Nana Complex (Soi 4, just off of Sukhumvit), has about 20 or so Go-Go bars. I made it through about five or six, and again saw twice as much potential there as at EDSA complex. Maybe not as good as Soi Cowboy overall. Soi Cowboy (between Soi 21 and Soi 23, on a road just off Sukhumvit, which runs parallel to it, is a two block long strip of about 10 Go-Go bars and 10 beer/band bars. I ventured into about four of the Go-Go bars, and saw at least twice as much potential at those four as at the whole EDSA complex, in Manila. Soi 33, just off of Sukhumvit, has about a dozen beer bars, each of which have about a half dozen to a dozen hostesses each, available to chat with you and have you buy them drinks, or be bar-fined, if they like you. I went into about six of the bars, three of which had one or two quality candidates for more intimate conversations. Also, numerous massage parlors, of which I looked into about six, and only saw one that was impressive and would go back to, Naturee, on the Metro line about four stops north of Sukhumvit, about 25-30 minutes getting there from the Asok station, by Sukhumvit and Soi 19. The four times I arrived there, between 3:30 and 5:00 PM, it had from 50-100 girls available from which to choose, about two-thirds in the 18-21 age range. I was the only Caucasian there though, and the real newbies were too scared to go with me, apparently tales of the white man's large nature having preceded me. In general, Thai girls speak very little English compared to Filippinas, with probably 2/3 of the beer bar/go-go girls and all of the massage girls having no more than a couple hundred word English vocabulary, if that. So conversation is mostly limited, until you learn some Thai. Go-go dancers more aggressive and short-timers, especially if they can get back to the bar before closing, whereas bar girls are not so overly aggressive and more likely to stay the whole night. Pataya is a beach town here where you can relax, get out of the city and have some fun. Here you can find chicks playing checkers in these outdoor bars—enticing you to come and drink at their little area, while mommasun patiently watches over the flirting. If you like one, bar fine her and have fun. We stayed at one place in Pataya where my buddy Ben and I had a hotel room with our own private indoor pool with swim up bar—AND our own private back door entrance to the titty bar neighboring the hotel. For $70 a night, we also had our own hot tube, Jacuzzi, stripper pole and sex swing in the room. Outrageous.
I love this country. The food is good. Capitalism is thriving. The women are hot. And since the dudes here don’t take any shit from their women, they are generally well-mannered and well-behaved. There are an extra-ordinary number of professional women here. To meet the non-professionals you will have to brush up on your Russian before you come. You will definitely need it. Tveriskia is one of the main streets here and it leads to Red Square. You will see more Beamers and Mercedes here than anywhere else on earth. And the nicest Ferrari store anywhere in the world—Lenin must be turning over in his grave. They are literally hanging from the rafters. There are lots of Western Hotels here, where there are English Speaking staff, which you can often times hire privately to go out with you and help you translate with the ladies. Just make sure he or she is young, cool and into the ladies like you are. Just walking around the town will give you more than ample opportunity to try out your Russian with the local women. Don’t be shy. They expect you to be bold and daring! Just don’t piss off any of the local, mafia-looking guys in the black suites who even have the remotest of chances to be with the chick you are talking to. There are no fights in Russia. Guys just know to walk away or risk getting killed. For the pros, Night Flight has been around forever and is the standard when it comes to professional women in Moscow. Smoking hot, dressed to the nines and set to prey on the hundreds of foreign businessmen who come here every week. Wear a jacket and tie or risk looking like a jack ass. Alternatively you can stay or hang out at the Hilton in Red Square, where the pros are around all of the time and more than willing to help take your mind off of the hard day of getting rejected by the local girls.
Home of the University of South Carolina Game Cocks, baby! Haha… I just love saying that. So this city is a college town with a little more to it. Wet Willies (for those high octane frozen drinks), Flying Saucer (with their smoking, hot waitresses), Jillians, Liberty Tap,Mushroom, and Wild Hare Sports Bar (where most of the locals hang out) are great places to meet the ladies. They are all in a section of town called Vista, a more professional part of town but the college girls over 21 will come here, if not to party, then to work as waitresses and bar tenders.
Five Points is where more of the YP hangs out. It’s not too far from campus—just down Blossom. Cheaper bars with drink specials and college nights—places like Sharky’s, LocalsLucky’s, etc. There’s a two story Starbucks and of course a Pita Pit to score late night munchies to soak up the alcohol! Both great places to meet the Y.
On campus of course the hotties abound. The girls here got some junk in the trunk—especially the white girls! Go figure. The campus gym is amazing. Sneak in and work out and meet some the Y on the stair master. After you’re done with the work out, mingle with the girls over at Yoghut. It’s a cool frozen yogurt place that the girls totally love—and it’s right next to campus. Stay at the Sheraton downtown. It used to be an old-school bank— with a mechanized vault and all. The girls will totally dig it. Best restaurant in the city is the Blue Marlin— a great place for a date with that beautiful girl you met last night. Impressive entrance and good eats. You can always take a girl to nearby Augusta, Georgia, where fat, old, rich men play golf. Stay at the Marriot and eat at the Maison Restaurant-- owned and run by an old German Chef. Nice and romantic.