Gronigen is a hang out in a bar, drink cheap beer and scam on giant-sized girls kind of place in addition to being home of one of Holland's more popular universities. The main buildings of the university are just off of Academie Broer and Oude Boteringestraat. Head here during the day, walk in any direction and you are likely to run into a branch of the university, since it is disjointedly spread out all over the city. All of the good bars, and I mean all of them, are on Poelestraat and Peperstraat just off of the city's main square. Go door to door like a Jehovah's Witness and check each one out. Unlike a Jehovah's Witness, settle down where you find the best booty. The students mostly head home for the weekends. So being that this is basically a university town, be sure to visit during the week. As in most college towns, Thursday night is best. Plan your itinerary accordingly, unless you want to spend your time with the big-haired locals that take over the bar scene on the weekends. Herestraat is the main street while runs right through the city center. It's packed with stores, places to eat, and places to meet beautiful girls from Northern Holland. When it's warm outside, there are carnivals and outdoor markets in Vismarkt just west of here. Definitely be sure to check them out. There is an awful lot of mighty fine, local Dutch YP walking around.
I love this country. The food is good. Capitalism is thriving. The women are hot. And since the dudes here don’t take any shit from their women, they are generally well-mannered and well-behaved. There are an extra-ordinary number of professional women here. To meet the non-professionals you will have to brush up on your Russian before you come. You will definitely need it. Tveriskia is one of the main streets here and it leads to Red Square. You will see more Beamers and Mercedes here than anywhere else on earth. And the nicest Ferrari store anywhere in the world—Lenin must be turning over in his grave. They are literally hanging from the rafters. There are lots of Western Hotels here, where there are English Speaking staff, which you can often times hire privately to go out with you and help you translate with the ladies. Just make sure he or she is young, cool and into the ladies like you are. Just walking around the town will give you more than ample opportunity to try out your Russian with the local women. Don’t be shy. They expect you to be bold and daring! Just don’t piss off any of the local, mafia-looking guys in the black suites who even have the remotest of chances to be with the chick you are talking to. There are no fights in Russia. Guys just know to walk away or risk getting killed. For the pros, Night Flight has been around forever and is the standard when it comes to professional women in Moscow. Smoking hot, dressed to the nines and set to prey on the hundreds of foreign businessmen who come here every week. Wear a jacket and tie or risk looking like a jack ass. Alternatively you can stay or hang out at the Hilton in Red Square, where the pros are around all of the time and more than willing to help take your mind off of the hard day of getting rejected by the local girls.
Fly into the Branson Airport if you can. It’s the only privately owned commercial airport in the USA and as such, its pretty cool looking. But this place is one of the cheesiest places I’ve evern been to in my life. If you don’t believe me, cruz down Route 76 through downtown Branson to see what your life will be like when you have a family and when you retire and have nothing to do. Cheesy restaurants, theme bars and shows line the street. Dinner and drinks at Chateau on the Lake will get you so runkled—I can’t even keep the smile off of my face.
Hungary hands down has the most beautiful women in Eastern Europe, and like the Czech Republic, there as a great variety of women to choose from. It's hard to type cast the typical Hungarian babe. She comes in all shapes and sizes and a few different hair colors. In fact about the only thing they have in common is that they tend to be very beautiful. Many have incredible bodies that rival the women of Spain and Holland, and damn sexy accents. (I have many Australian PB friends of mine who swear by them.) Fortunately, many of the young people in Hungary speak English, because they can make money off of the millions of tourists who visit their country each year, if they do. And thank God they do. Their language is as hard to learn as the Asian languages to someone who is used to speaking English or one of the Latin-derived, Romance languages. If you speak German you are stoked, as almost everyone considers this the second language of Hungary, although soon to be overtaken by English. Following the Soviet occupation, which ended in 1989, the Hungarians found themselves almost totally and completely dependent on tourism to support their economy and obtain cold, hard, western currency. Thousands of businessmen from the West infiltrated this country looking for opportunities to make money in subsequent years, and they found them. A walk through downtown Budapest would convince anyone that McDonalds, Coca Cola and MTV have taken over this part of the world. Consequently, resentment grew among the Hungarians who felt that the infiltration of Western culture, language and business into their country was bad for the Hungarian people. It's a catch 22; They realize that they need the West in order to prosper economically in the future, but they resent the fact that they do and wish they could reclaim their country and cultural identity from the multitude of foreigners who have come here. You may ask what the hell this has to do with you. Well, this attitude may effect you in your efforts to hook up in Hungary. Be sympathetic and understanding, but not dickless. This will get you rankled. Don't cop a "Don't you wish you were me" attitude with the Hungarian chicks. (This goes for the Czech chicks as well, jerky.) As in the Czech Republic, there are often two prices for goods and services in this country— one, which the locals pay and another, which the tourists pay. That gets to be annoying after a while, especially in the bars and restaurants. But it is still cheap as hell to eat, sleep and party. Ice cream and vodka practically cost pennies in Hungary. That's about the only beneficial legacy of the Soviet occupation. They kept the price of these items low to keep the masses happy. It's amazing what dessert, a good buzz and a few divisions of armored tanks can do to keep people smiling. The only big city worth going to in Hungary is Budapest. Most of the best places to be are on the cosmopolitan Pest side of the Danube River in Districts 5 and 6, although there are very good places to hang out in other districts. The daytime babe watching can be done in the shopping districts of Vaci Utca and Vorosmarty. This place does not have the outrageous party atmosphere that many other larger cities further west do, however if you ask the locals and keep your eyes and ears open, you will be sure to find some honeys hanging at a few of Budapest's favorite nocturnal haunts. Oh, and don't worry about finding accommodations. The hucksters practically assault you as soon as you get off the train. Their job is to find you a place to stay. If you are here in the summer you may find yourself staying at one of the universities whose dormitories double as youth hostels from late June through August. There is sure to be some Hungarian Y around. Get to know them and ask where everyone's going. The best bars and clubs to hang out early evening are Cafe Mediterran and Incognito on Liszt Ferenc Ter and the Irish Cat and Museum Cukraszada on Museum Korut. Later head to Morrison's Music Pub on Revay ut, Yes on Hegedus Gyola utca, Alkotas Presszo on Alkotas ut and the seedy titty bar/whore house Barbados on Vaci utca in District 5. Late night on a weekend you have to check out Tilos on Mikszath Kalman ter, Bahahof and Dreher Jakekterem on Vaci ut in District 13, Bamboo on Dessewfly utca, Hully Gully on Apor Vilmos ter and Aztec on Mozsai" utca. Just a quick note; definitely do not miss the world famous Hungarian bath houses. These places, like their Japanese rivals, are unbelievable. As in any city in Eastern Europe, be careful when riding in a cab. The cab drivers are notorious for taking dumb, drunk foreigners for a ride to rid them of the forints that are basically worthless outside of this country's borders. Also as in other Eastern European countries there is organized Mafia who tends to frequent many of the clubs here in Budapest. Although formidable at times, these guys pale in comparison to their counterparts and mentors in Los Angeles, Miami or New York City. Try not to piss them off just the same. I here Hungarian prisons are just about as charming as those in Mexico.
The Basque Country extends from Spain into the southwest region of France and includes the city of Biarritz. I already ranted and raved about the Basque Country in a previous section of this book, so I'll be brief in this one. Biarritz is cozy little beach town with some great surf to be conquered in its waters and some beautiful babes to be conquered on its shores. This explains why so many California ex-pats have immigrated here. The women here are just as beautiful as the Basques across the border. Beautiful, half-naked, friendly women, warm weather and a great nightlife. What more could you ask for? Check out the bars and clubs on the Rue de Port Vieux, Rue Mazagran and Avenue de Verdun and their side streets when night falls. You may never go home.
Philadelphia is where the thirteen colonies ratified the Declaration of Independence and freed themselves from British rule. Maybe they knew what we do about English girls! This city is very Italian. Your competition is sporting a big-ass, cheesy gold chain, a tank top, tanning salon complexion, complete with well-moussed hair and dark jacket. I know, because a lot of my best friends are Italian, and I've seen them this way, despite all my teasing and prodding them in the direction of good taste. The nightlife here is great though, and there are always some stunning women in the bars and clubs. These places are typical meat markets and are no place for the timid, so adjust your rap accordingly, and do your best to set yourself apart from the "typical" dude that so often frequents these nocturnal dwellings in search for YP. That is best accomplished by walking upright, having a high school diploma, no criminal record and driving anything other than a Camaro. Oh, and a suite would help. During the day, if you are in the mood to check out the YP in Phili, head to University City (which looks more like a prison than a city), the home of some not-so-bad-looking girls at Drexel. On the weekends, the places to be in Philadelphia are in and around South Street and Christopher Columbus Boulevard (called Delaware Avenue by the locals). Try Cafe Limbo and Mako's on South Street or Gothum, Spring Garden and Rock Lobster on Christopher Columbus Blvd. Alternatively, head to the Irish Pub on Walnut St. and 20th, Trocadero on Arch Street, Xero on 4th Street, 111 on Chesnut and 3rd, Shampoo and the Bank on 8th. Take note; the Italian girls hear have perfect bodies, dress well and like to be spoiled by the men they meet, while out on the town. You've got to open the wallet a little. If you have access to a car or know someone with a ride, head just outside of Philadelphia to the Manayuk area and the River Deck Cafe for happy hour late in the workweek.