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GOD DAMN FACTOR

Philadelphia is where the thirteen colonies ratified the Declaration of Independence and freed themselves from British rule. Maybe they knew what we do about English girls! This city is very Italian. Your competition is sporting a big-ass, cheesy gold chain, a tank top, tanning salon complexion, complete with well-moussed hair and dark jacket. I know, because a lot of my best friends are Italian, and I've seen them this way, despite all my teasing and prodding them in the direction of good taste.

The nightlife here is great though, and there are always some stunning women in the bars and clubs. These places are typical meat markets and are no place for the timid, so adjust your game accordingly and do your best to set yourself apart. That is best accomplished by walking upright, having a high school diploma, no criminal record, and driving anything other than a Camaro. Oh, and a suit would help.

During the day, if you are in the mood to check out the girls in Philly, head to University City (which looks more like a prison than a city), the home of some not-so-bad-looking girls at Drexel.

On the weekends, the places to be in Philadelphia are in and around South Street and Christopher Columbus Boulevard (called Delaware Avenue by the locals). Try Cafe Limbo and Mako's on South Street or Gothum, Spring Garden, and Rock Lobster on Christopher Columbus Blvd. Alternatively, head to the Irish Pub on Walnut St. and 20th, Trocadero on Arch Street, Xero on 4th Street, 111 on Chesnut and 3rd, Shampoo and the Bank on 8th.

Take note: the Italian girls here dress well and like to be spoiled by the men they meet while out on the town. You've got to open the wallet a little.

If you have access to a car or know someone with a ride, head just outside of Philadelphia to the Manayunk area and the River Deck Cafe for happy-hour late in the workweek.

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Philadelphia, PA, USA

November 11, 2021

8.5

God Damn Factor

Philadelphia is where the thirteen colonies ratified the Declaration of Independence and freed themselves from British rule. Maybe they knew what we do about English girls! This city is very Italian. Your competition is sporting a big-ass, cheesy gold chain, a tank top, tanning salon complexion, complete with well-moussed hair and dark jacket. I know, because a lot of my best friends are Italian, and I've seen them this way, despite all my teasing and prodding them in the direction of good taste.

The nightlife here is great though, and there are always some stunning women in the bars and clubs. These places are typical meat markets and are no place for the timid, so adjust your game accordingly and do your best to set yourself apart. That is best accomplished by walking upright, having a high school diploma, no criminal record, and driving anything other than a Camaro. Oh, and a suit would help.

During the day, if you are in the mood to check out the girls in Philly, head to University City (which looks more like a prison than a city), the home of some not-so-bad-looking girls at Drexel.

On the weekends, the places to be in Philadelphia are in and around South Street and Christopher Columbus Boulevard (called Delaware Avenue by the locals). Try Cafe Limbo and Mako's on South Street or Gothum, Spring Garden, and Rock Lobster on Christopher Columbus Blvd. Alternatively, head to the Irish Pub on Walnut St. and 20th, Trocadero on Arch Street, Xero on 4th Street, 111 on Chesnut and 3rd, Shampoo and the Bank on 8th.

Take note: the Italian girls here dress well and like to be spoiled by the men they meet while out on the town. You've got to open the wallet a little.

If you have access to a car or know someone with a ride, head just outside of Philadelphia to the Manayunk area and the River Deck Cafe for happy-hour late in the workweek.

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New York, NY, USA

November 11, 2021

8

The Doctor

New York is as big and daunting as Los Angeles, Paris, or London with an attitude to match. During the day when masses of humanity commute into the city from neighboring communities to work, the population swells to greater than four times that of the entire country of Norway.

There are 5 boroughs in New York. It is safe to ignore four of them and concentrate your efforts on Manhattan. That's where you'll see and do everything that New York is so famous for, including its female residents.

The best time to be in New York is around Christmas/Hanukah and New Years. New Yorkers are actually friendly to each other when they are in the Christmas spirit. It's even customary to tip the muggers during the Yuletide! The stores on 5th and Park Avenues are absolutely mobbed, and the New Year's Eve party in Times Square draws hundreds of thousands of people every single year from around the world.

Yes, there are beautiful women in New York, but many of them won't want to go out with anyone they don't know, because there this place is big and full of strange men. Most of the women can't tell if you're one or not, so they usually play it safe and brush off all advances. If you have seen some of the men in this city, you can understand why they may do this. Don't be discouraged. Like in any big city with a similar attitude, you can still woo a local if you're smart and put in the effort. It's infinitely easier though if a friend or acquaintance who she knows and trusts introduces you to the chick so she knows you're safe.

During the day, head to Madison Ave, 5th Ave, and Avenue of the Americas where the women will be out shopping. Key places are Henri Bendels, Bergdorf Goodman, and Barneys. To make any sort of impression, have a major trust fund and own a Ferrari. Otherwise, just look the part. Like Paris, Milan, and Madrid, there are a ton of fashion models around, although diluted in a solute of millions of other girls, many of which may not be the least bit attractive. If you're really lucky you might run into a group of them out in the Village or Soho, since they tend to hang out there together with the rest of the international model crowd.

The happening bars and clubs in the city change constantly. By the time you read this, what's hot now won't be, and clubs that will be probably don't even exist yet. But Webster Hall on East 11th between 3rd and 4th Avenues, the Tunnel on 12th Avenue and 27th' System on 13th and 3rd and the Palladium on East 14th between 3rd and 4th seem to survive year to year and are sure to be good on the weekend. Take a look at what's online before you go into the club. These clubs tend to be full of tourists. These clubs are not cheap, and there is plenty of attitude to fill clubs 10 times their size, but they are worth checking out since they are exactly the kind of clubs you would expect from a place like New York. Dress well and bring plenty of cash. These places are often divided into sections with different clientele inhabiting different sections. Sometimes the security men won't let you into certain parts of the club if you don't have the right look for that section.

There are an enormous number of places in New York that are as good as the aforementioned clubs, but perhaps less known to those who don't live here. Twilo on 27th and 10th Ave, The Cheetah Club on 21st and 5th, Opera on 21st and 12*, Kaos off of Union Square, the China Bar on 63rd, The Roxy on West 18th, Dorian's on 7th Avenue, the Spy Bar on Green Street, Merc on Mercer Street, Envy on the corner of Hudson, Touch in Times Square and Spring, Liquids on 36th and 12th are all pretty good and feature a nice variety of fine-looking chicas from all over New York and adjacent New Jersey.

The upper-East Side is just east of Central Park from about 5th Avenue to 1st Avenue and from about 40th Street to 98th Street. There are a lot of professional types who live here and more millionaires per square foot than anywhere else in the world (because they are stacked on top of each other in the skyrises)! The upper-East side is also home to the greatest collection of art museums in the United States. The Metropolitan Museum of Art, the Whitney Museum of American Art, MOMA (Museum of Modern Art), the Frick Museum, and the Guggenheim are located here. Most of New York's greatest restaurants like Aureole, Le Cirque, Daniel, Le Chantilly, Four Seasons, Fifty Seven, and Lespinasse are in the upper-East side. Both the culture and the cash so prevalent on the upper-East side will ensure a steady supply of hot women in the area at any given time.

If you prefer the uptown crowd frequented by the many good-looking, young female professionals in this city who call New York their home, head to Venue on West 38th, Prohibition, the Bowery Bar on East 4th Street, Polyesters on 8th Street (there are actually two in the city), the Ski Bar on 2nd Avenue, Brother Jimmy's on 76th and 1st, Moe's Caribbean, Iggy's, Sweet Melissa's, Bare Bar* Bar 13, Merchants on Thomas Street, the Gingerman, Jake's Dilemma on Amsterdam, the Lemon Bar, the Union Bar and Phoebe's on Columbus Ave. These places tend to have a lot of chicks relaxing having a drink with their friends, perhaps a small dance floor, and a lot of flirting going on. Unfortunately, the ratio in these places may be unfavorable for the enthusiastic guy, so be bold and daring, lest you lose out to squid with the balls to roll up on a table full of girls talking with each other and seemingly uninterested in meeting anyone.

There are also a lot of good-looking women on the upper-West side. They are mostly Jewish girls in packs of 10 to 20 who may seem totally unapproachable to you but give them a shot. If you have a Jewish friend from New York, chances are that he'll know a few of the girls in these bars and can introduce you. This is a very close-knit community in which everybody knows each other. Oftentimes, they've already hooked up with multiple individuals within the same social circle. Know someone and be a successful dentist or lawyer with a name that ends in "berg" or "stein", if at all possible. And take off that crucifix from around your neck. Save it, the tank top, and the steroids for when you go out in New Jersey.

If you are looking for the best strip clubs money can buy in New York City, head to Scores on East 60th Street, Shenanaggins, NY Dolls on Murray Street, Tens, and Flash Dancers on Broadway. A table dance will set you back $10, but they are frequently tipped much more than this by all the Wall Street types.

If you're in New York during the summertime head for the beaches in the Hamptons out on Long Island. Here you will find all of the beautiful Jewish and Italian girls you could ever want. The Hamptons is a general area on the eastern side of Long Island, including the towns of East Hampton, West Hampton, and South Hampton. In addition, Amagansett, Sag Harbour, the Moriches, Shelter Island, and Montauk are more or less considered parts of the Hamptons. South Hampton is a playground for the rich and famous, but the other towns and beaches may bring you more luck as the level of pretentiousness is far less. Generally, it's way too difficult to only come out here for the day or the evening since the traffic on the way out here is horrible on the summer weekends. It's much easier if you know someone who has a place out here where you can crash. Keep an eye out so that you don't step on any medical waste or hypodermic needles on the Hampton beaches. The girls here may have left New York City, but they didn't forget to pack their attitudes. They never leave home without them. So the same rules for New York apply out here. Dress well, know someone, be introduced or be bold and daring.

Club M80, Boom, and Tavern on Route 27/Sunrise Highway in South Hampton are the places to be come nightfall to meet the beautiful NYC chicks who abandon the heat of the city every weekend and head to the beach.

Alternatively, head to the lesser places in West Hampton like Tongue in Groove and Cassey's. Don't feel as though you are missing out if you can't make it out to the Hamptons in the summertime. This city is packed with Europeans, Americans visiting from other parts of the United States and rich girls home from college or boarding school from June through August, so there are sure to be plenty of options around.

New York City also has some of the best eats in the world. Once you meet that Wall Street girl you have always dreamed of, take her to Dim Sum Go Go, The Spotted Pig, The Magnolia Café, Per Se, Baboo, The Standard, or Mas farmhouse. Good food makes women like you more. It is a provider/hunter/gather primal instincts thing. Don't fight it. Go with it...

El Paso, TX, USA

November 8, 2021

7.5

The Doctor

If you love Mexican girls, this is the place for you. This is a border town with all of the problems that a border town has: crime, illegal immigrants, drug smugglers, and gunshots flying across the border from the Mexican side threatening your health and well-being. Sounds like fun doesn't it? Whatever you do in El Paso, don't be an idiot. DO NOT get convinced to visit the Mexican side of the border for any reason, unless you want to get kidnapped, killed, or worse.

Downtown El Paso is seeing a revival.  It used to be a total shithole, but the old, run-down abandoned warehouses have been converted to swanky nightclubs. Brick and Mortar, Plum, and Shadow are great places to meet girls. Don't be shy and brush up on your Espanol beforehand. But take care to avoid pissing off that tattooed, heavy-set, mean-looking Mexican guy with his homies in VIP talking to his girl. You don't want to get shot heading back to your car that night. Seriously. I'm not joking.

During the day, check out the University of Texas-El Paso (UTEP) for the Y and line it up for later that evening. Besides that, don't bother trolling around looking for girls.

Jersey Shore, NJ, USA

November 9, 2021

8

The Doctor

If you're in New Jersey during the summertime, check out the beaches at Belmar, Long Beach Island, and Wildwood. There are always girls there on the weekends when the weather's hot. Belmar has the beautiful, guido-loving, collegiate types from North Jersey, while Wildwood and its infamous boardwalk tends to cater more towards families and a younger crowd.

All you men take note - all of the bars on the Jersey shore are cheesy as hell. So if you shave your chest, drive an "I-Roc", wear gold chains and call yourself "Vito", you will feel right at home.

Generally, the further south you go on the shore the less cheesy it becomes, but lately, the cheese has been spilling out as far south as Long Beach Island. The Shell on Engleside or the Katch are the only two places to really meet girls in Long Beach on summer weekends.

Fort Myers, FL, USA

November 8, 2021

7.5

The Doctor

Ft. Myers, Florida is a few hours car trip south of Tampa. It isn't worth a special trip at all unless you have a hook-up at Florida Gulf Coast University. The girls here are relatively decent looking, but what college girls in Florida don't look good?

There is a small beach on campus by the water. Check it out to find beachgoers sunbathing on the sand after class. It's a small school and relatively new.

Most of the decent bars and restaurants are close to campus. Malony’s Sports Bar is good on Thursday nights, the universal college night of the week. If you meet the girls on the volleyball team at FGCU, pile in the car and head down to Blue Martini in Naples and look like a stud to the valet guys as the car full of 6-foot tall college girls in high heels pour out of the car.

Charleston, SC, USA

November 2, 2021

8.5

The Doctor

Shockingly this town is a really good time. Fantastic restaurants, Southern hospitality, cool boutique hotels, and beautiful, friendly girls!

Market Street is full of cool college bars with college girls in them Thursday through Saturday, as the College of Charleston is right downtown. Mad River, Johnsons, and Wild Wings are some of the best in town.

There are some cool roof-top bars here. There is one at the Venue Hotel and Henry’s.

The fantastic restaurants in this city include Rue de Jean, Cypress, Pearls, Basil, Blossom, the Library at the Venue Hotel, and High Cotton.

Richmond, VA, USA

November 12, 2021

8

The Doctor

In Richmond, the Fan District is where it’s at. Three Monkeys and Starlight are fun.

Stay at the Omni, it is close to everything  The Else at the Omni is a cool place. Right around the corner are Havana 59 and Tobacco Company where the waitresses are super cute. BW3, Stool Pigeons, Little Buda, Cha Chas aren't bad either.

While you're here, head to Virginia Commonwealth University (VCU) for the hot college girls.