November 15, 2021
San Marcos, Texas, Home of Texas State University. This used to be a teaching college back in the day, with an obviously disproportionately high female student population. Now it's a big-time party school with their own football team and a downtown square that may soon rival their Austin neighbors.
Bar 141 above Bar Fish is a crazy fun dance club full of TSU girls. Harbors, Shaun Patricks, Zelios, Taxis, Showdown, Vodka Street, Tap Room, and Treff's Tavern are all good from Thursday through Saturday night. Hopefully, you'll find a gaggle of sorority girls all dressed to the nines and you can work your best game.
I once went to visit my buddy here when he attended TSU as a freshman. I walked into his room and he was playing video games. Through the half-open door, I saw half-naked coeds prancing around the hallways and I just about fell over. "Are you insane?" I asked him - get your ass out there! as I smashed the video consul on the floor. Needless to say, that boy got an education that day!
This is the preferred destination for spring break for the VERY young man - I’m talking high school students - especially around Barefoot Landing. Broadway is full of cheesy beach town stores and restaurants. It reminds me of the Jersey Shore a little bit.
For a more grown-up scene, try the Kryptonite (K Club) or the Tunnel on Friday and Saturday nights, or the Boat House early on Sundays in the summertime. The boaters and their hot wives, girlfriends, and daughters will be there late afternoon to late evening.
The best place to bring a date for an impressive dinner is Legrands - great wine list, food, and service.
There is a decent Hooters here and a few good strip clubs in this town: the Penthouse and Doll House have the hottest girls. All the same rules of hitting on strippers and the help apply here in Myrtle Beach, SC.
If you get sick of Miami's pretentiousness or can't stand that salsa and meringue echoing in your ears anymore, retreat northward to Ft. Lauderdale. There lie beautiful girls as well, but they are distinctly American. Check it out in the daytime during the academic year.
Fort Lauderdale's shopping district is centered on Sawgrass Mills and Los Olas Blvd, and there are plenty of girls here out and about.
Many of Fort Lauderdale's best clubs are located on the corners of Sunrise and North Ocean Boulevards and on the oceanfront strip along Atlantic Blvd., where the beaches, bars, and babes abide. My favorite places include Elbow Room, Hooters, LuLu’s, and Exit 66.
Downtown Lauderdale has really evolved as a place to meet women. Automatic Slims (especially on college night Thursdays during the school year), Americas Back Yard, Himmarshee, Side Bar, Brick, Briny Pub, Cayote Ugly, Hooka Bar, VooDoo (Ladies night on Thursdays) and Tarpin Bend are awesome for the ladies.
For great food and drinks early, hot waitresses, and more mature women, do Bova Prime and Yolo on Las Olas. The hottest women in Fort Lauderdale work on the weekends, so be sure you know how to hit on the help, player boy.
These are a couple of suburbs just south of LA just off of the 405 and right by John Wayne Airport. Super small, but there are some quality women here, ranging from the relatively young professional female with her own money, to the young, pretty daughter of the rich local businessman, to divorced MILF's, to jail bait - you name it.
Taleo in Newport is a cool, hip, Mexican fusion restaurant and bar with a great happy hour during the week. If you get bored, check out The Daily Dose (or Double D, as the locals call it) - it's right across the way from Taleo. Afterward, head to La Cave in Costa Mesa. As the name implies, it is underground. It's a restaurant by day and a bar/lounge/dance club by night.
Why would you love this place? Well, it's easy. The women here appreciate older, successful, educated men since this town is full of them. Her father probably is, and you know how girls always go for guys like their fathers. So she will totally dig that Harvard ring and that degree behind your name. Happy smooching.
Stay at the Island Hotel - an oasis/paradise a short cab ride away. It's sure to impress the ladies. Really close to the Island Hotel is an area called Fashion Island with a lot of shops and restaurants. You can walk there in 8 minutes from the hotel. There you will find the rich wives, ex-wives, and daughters of the guys in this town who are totally LOADED. Find that trust fund baby and have her pay for drinks for a change. There is a Yard House here as well as an R & D Kitchen. Outside, between the big, retail clothing stores, there are great places to lounge about and people watch the passersby by with their new stuff, bought and paid for by whatever man is sponsoring their shopping spree that day.
Nearby in Irvine, CA, check out a section of town called The District which has loads of bars, restaurants, and places to hang out. If you are here in the early fall, the Taste of Newport Festival is always a good time. All the big restaurants and bars have a booth there. There is live music and beautiful girls all about, mostly working there in the booths. It's perfect.
Austin hands down has the most beautiful women in Texas.
The action in Austin centers on 4th, 5th and 6th Streets where all the collegiates from the University of Texas at Austin and Texas State roam. The girls at this school are unbelievable, probably the best in all the South. If you have to pick one day out of the year to party here, let it be Halloween. If you can get yourself invited to a fraternity party on campus on Halloween, you will know what I am talking about.
If you like to drink, head downtown on a Thursday. Bars like Pete's Peanut Shack have ridiculous drink specials. It's an alcoholic's dream. The entire weekend is amazing from Thursday to Saturday.
The Hooters on Riverside is excellent—lots of beautiful women. The Ranch, Iron Cactus, The Library, and Friends are some of my favorites, but you literally can just pick a random spot on any of these streets and find a good time. Everything is within walking distance.
For the best adult entertainment in Austin, head to Sugar's or the Yellow Rose. The clubs are significantly better than the ones in Houston.
Nearby Lake Travis or Lake Austin is the place to be on summer weekends. The Hula Hut - affectionately nicknamed the “butt hut” - is the best place on Lake Austin. Water Lu Ice House, Little Woodrows in Hill Country Galleria and Steiner Ranch Steak House in Lake Travis on Thursdays aren’t too bad. Oasis on Lake Travis is a great place for a date. Sunday brunch here is legendary. This is where hot Texas girls go when they want to show off their bodies in the summertime. Try Carlos and Charlie’s on Lake Travis later afternoon on Saturdays and Sundays in the summer, when the water level is up. Lake Travis can get really low due to drought, making tourism slow. You won’t be disappointed.
Don't miss out on visiting Santa Barbara just north of LA. It's fun and packed with beautiful women from all over California. Santa Barbara, along with nearby Malibu, is where Baywatch was filmed, to give you an idea of what you're working with.
During the academic year, it's packed with gorgeous college girls. In the summertime, the less pretentious Californians come here on the weekends to get away from LA.
Santa Barbara is probably my favorite city in the US because it reminds me of the Basque country in Europe. There's a big university - the University of California at Santa Barbara out on La Isla Vista, which should be named La Isla de Chica Finita; a great nightlife, which centers in and around State Street; and beautiful girls. Half of the girls I saw on the campus of UCSB or out on State Street from Thursday through Saturday night turned my head. On top of all that, the beach on La Isla Vista is packed with UCSB girls when it's hot outside.
I went to a fraternity party on campus here one year and I almost didn't leave. Going to Harvard was definitely not worth missing out on fours years of this. And oh, did I mention? If you think the girls at UCSB were hot, take a walk over to Santa Barbara City College just off of Shoreline Beach by State Street. The girls who were too hot and not bright enough to get into UCSB are all here. Santa Barbara gets the best GDF score in the US!
Atlantic City is great in the summertime when the mostly Italian residents of nearby Philadelphia head over here on the weekends to sunbathe on the beach during the day and party at night. The beaches aren't that great, but who cares.
The casinos here are as good as in Vegas or Monaco, and are usually full of beautiful people. Donald Trump and the Italian Mafia run all of them. Check out Trump's former jewel, the Hard Rock Hotel & Casino (previously known as then Taj Mahal), and play some blackjack. If you don't win, at least you'll drink for free and hopefully get some comps to ease the hurt of losing some potential party money.
The two best clubs here on the summer weekends are by far Boogie Nights on Boardwalk and The Pool After Dark just outside the city. They are more or less like the clubs in Philadelphia, just with freshly tanned bodies in less clothing.
Be careful with the cops in this town, they are unpredictable at times and will hassle you for seemingly no good reason. Apparently, nobody has bothered to tell them that they're patrolling the Sodom and Gomorrah of the East Coast, replete with hookers, pimps, gangsters, and muggers. But God forbid you toss the last bite of your hot dog on the Boardwalk. Just be careful, or you'll be wishing you had a Monopoly "Get out of Jail Free" card.