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GOD DAMN FACTOR

Definitely do not miss a trip to West Palm Beach/Boca Raton if you can help it. Clematis Street in West Palm is phat on Thursday night when all of the Y comes out to play. Check out Dr. Feel Good, Monarchy,Rocko’s Tacos, Roxy’s and Bradley. City Place is super close to Clematis.  My fav places there are Blue Martini and Opa. Boca Raton is terrible these days.  The Jewish wives of all the rich dudes here have totally ruined the place.  There are no decent clubs anymore.  The Hooters here (which was once the best in the world) was forced to shut down.  For the YP head to Town Center Boca—a young hip mall, where you can troll for YP.  For more daytime game, head to the campus at Florida Atlantic University, where community college education never looked so good.  Or try Breezzi’s on the weekends.

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West Palm Beach, FL, USA

October 25, 2021

9.0

God Damn Factor

Definitely do not miss a trip to West Palm Beach/Boca Raton if you can help it. Clematis Street in West Palm is phat on Thursday night when all of the Y comes out to play. Check out Dr. Feel Good, Monarchy,Rocko’s Tacos, Roxy’s and Bradley. City Place is super close to Clematis.  My fav places there are Blue Martini and Opa. Boca Raton is terrible these days.  The Jewish wives of all the rich dudes here have totally ruined the place.  There are no decent clubs anymore.  The Hooters here (which was once the best in the world) was forced to shut down.  For the YP head to Town Center Boca—a young hip mall, where you can troll for YP.  For more daytime game, head to the campus at Florida Atlantic University, where community college education never looked so good.  Or try Breezzi’s on the weekends.

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Panama City Beach, FL, USA

November 11, 2021

8.5

The Doctor

Panama City rocks during the spring break season. Everything centers around "the strip" by the beach. The beach is always packed with honeys, but beware: the weather here tends to be the least predictable of all the spring break destinations. Panama City has been known to be cold and rainy while other spring break spots are warm and sunny, so cross your fingers.

On top of that the old BP oil disaster ensures that the water will be contaminated for years to come, despite what is reported on the news. Leave it to the British to screw things up for one of our favorite spring break destinations.

Despite these factors, Panama City is perhaps the most popular destination for spring break in Florida. MTV comes here almost every year and throws some decent parties. Who knows, you may wind up on TV.

When night falls, Club La Vela and the Spinnaker are awesome. Oh, these chicas! Girls from Alabama, Mississippi, Louisiana, and Florida love it here as a spring break destination.

The mother of all Panama city beach bars is Club La Vela. It's the largest nightclub in America with 12 theme rooms and a cool crowd. Perfect for all you club guys. Coyote Ugly is OK here. Spinnaker is a huge nightclub with live entertainment and dance theme rooms.

Want to escape the cheese with that hot local girl you just met? Take her to the Red Door, a local dive bar, or Ms. Newbys, another local, heavy pouring place. For the locals - i.e. anytime other than Spring Break, head over to Palafox Street downtown and just follow the noise. Good times.

Newport Beach, CA, USA

November 11, 2021

9

The Doctor

These are a couple of suburbs just south of LA just off of the 405 and right by John Wayne Airport. Super small, but there are some quality women here, ranging from the relatively young professional female with her own money, to the young, pretty daughter of the rich local businessman, to divorced MILF's, to jail bait - you name it.

Taleo in Newport is a cool, hip, Mexican fusion restaurant and bar with a great happy hour during the week. If you get bored, check out The Daily Dose (or Double D, as the locals call it) - it's right across the way from Taleo. Afterward, head to La Cave in Costa Mesa. As the name implies, it is underground. It's a restaurant by day and a bar/lounge/dance club by night.

Why would you love this place? Well, it's easy. The women here appreciate older, successful, educated men since this town is full of them. Her father probably is, and you know how girls always go for guys like their fathers. So she will totally dig that Harvard ring and that degree behind your name. Happy smooching.

Stay at the Island Hotel - an oasis/paradise a short cab ride away. It's sure to impress the ladies. Really close to the Island Hotel is an area called Fashion Island with a lot of shops and restaurants. You can walk there in 8 minutes from the hotel. There you will find the rich wives, ex-wives, and daughters of the guys in this town who are totally LOADED. Find that trust fund baby and have her pay for drinks for a change. There is a Yard House here as well as an R & D Kitchen. Outside, between the big, retail clothing stores, there are great places to lounge about and people watch the passersby by with their new stuff, bought and paid for by whatever man is sponsoring their shopping spree that day.

Nearby in Irvine, CA, check out a section of town called The District which has loads of bars, restaurants, and places to hang out. If you are here in the early fall, the Taste of Newport Festival is always a good time. All the big restaurants and bars have a booth there. There is live music and beautiful girls all about, mostly working there in the booths. It's perfect.

Atlanta, GA, USA

October 29, 2021

9

The Doctor

Georgia is home to some fine-looking women, especially in Atlanta. According to US census data, there are almost three times as many women as men between the ages of 18 and 30 who live in this city. Now that's a great ratio.

There are also tons of college girls in Atlanta being that universities such as Georgia Tech, Emory, Moorehouse, and Spelman Universities are located here.

Since "Hotlanta" is the financial capital of the southern United States, it's extremely international by Southern standards, so you'll have no trouble finding all sorts of different people to spend your time with here.

The best neighborhoods for nightlife are the bars and clubs in Buckhead on the corners of Peachtree and Buckhead Avenues and Little Five Points or Virginia-Highland on the corner of North Highland and Virginia Avenues. Buckhead is packed with clubs and restaurants that tend to cater to the post-collegiate working girls, although on the weekends the crowd skews a little younger.

Students tend to hang out at Little Five Points or Virginia-Highland, where the bars are a little more mellow and the beer a lot cheaper. A lot of students just come here to relax, but on Thursdays especially, the bars in this area can be happening. Try Blind Willie's on Highland Avenue for a start.

The big mall here is a place called Underground Atlanta. It has a few good bars on Kenny's Alley and places to eat, but lately, it's been getting a bad wrap for being in an "unsafe" area of town and thus has lost a lot of patronage to Buckhead and Little Five Points and Virginia-Highland. At least there's a Hooters?

The best strip clubs in the city are the Gold Club on Piedmont Avenue, Magic City on Forsyth St., and the Cheetah Club downtown.

About 30 miles north of Atlanta is a place called Alpharetta, Georgia (total suburban America), and there are some pretty women. The Hooters and Village Tavern out here are pretty damn awesome, and people tend to be way less full of themselves up here. Definitely more chill down-home girls.

San Marcos, TX, USA

November 15, 2021

8

The Doctor

San Marcos, Texas, Home of Texas State University. This used to be a teaching college back in the day, with an obviously disproportionately high female student population. Now it's a big-time party school with their own football team and a downtown square that may soon rival their Austin neighbors.

Bar 141 above Bar Fish is a crazy fun dance club full of TSU girls. Harbors, Shaun Patricks, Zelios, Taxis, Showdown, Vodka Street, Tap Room, and Treff's Tavern are all good from Thursday through Saturday night. Hopefully, you'll find a gaggle of sorority girls all dressed to the nines and you can work your best game. 

I once went to visit my buddy here when he attended TSU as a freshman. I walked into his room and he was playing video games. Through the half-open door, I saw half-naked coeds prancing around the hallways and I just about fell over. "Are you insane?" I asked him - get your ass out there! as I smashed the video consul on the floor. Needless to say, that boy got an education that day!

Hoboken, NJ, USA

November 8, 2021

8.5

The Doctor

Hoboken is just a short trip from New York City across the Lincoln or Holland Tunnel. This hot spot is under-the-radar, except for those who live in the New York/New Jersey area. It is said that there are more bars and women in the square mile that makes up Hoboken's downtown than anywhere else in the United States of America, and most of it is on Washington between 1st and 14th!

Weekends are the only time to go; when the place is packed with pretty girls from North Jersey and lots of guido types looking for the same thing you are. Beware the big-haired girls in this part of the country, cheesy Jersey shore types with low IQ's and hair that will not budge in 40 mile-per-hour winds. They're everywhere and tend to prefer the big, Italian guys who drive Iroc Z's and have names like Anthony, Angelo, Marco, and Stefano.

Hoboken Bar and Grill, Bahama Mommas, Nine, Black Bear, 340 Grill, Green Rock, Luiou, the W Hotel lounge, Trinity, and Mile Square are all good places. Don't get complacent in this town. You've got to work quickly and early to meet the best girls. This town is fairly non-pretentious, and there are a lot of professional women here. So with any luck, she may actually pick up the check, and you’ll still have a good time!

San Diego, CA, USA

November 15, 2021

8.5

The Doctor

San Diego is an awesome city. There are tons of beautiful girls here - Playbody is constantly at the local universities recruiting girls to do pictorials for college editions. The bad news is the girls in San Diego tend to date the same guy for years, which can be incredibly frustrating (unless you're him). They don't even go out all that often and give the rest of us a chance. It's not like there's a paucity of bars and clubs, either. San Diego is just one of those places inhabited by a bunch of early-to-bed, early-to-rise kind of people - except on the weekends.

Pacific Beach and Mission Beach are the collegiate, surfer, and military hangouts. La Jolla (pronounced La Hoya, for those of you who flunked high school Spanish and don't want to make an ass out of yourself) is wealthier and boring, but beautiful. Downtown is where it's at, and therefore where you should be! The Gas Lamp District downtown is freakin' awesome. It's and just a short taxi ride from the airport. Stay at the Hard Rock Hotel or the W Hotel - that is where all the beautiful people go.

Girls at the clubs here are similar quality to the ones in LA, but way less pretentious and easily approachable. Look good and dress well down here. Most everyone is fashion conscious since Hollywood is just up the road.

Stingaree, Fleetwood, Basic, La Puerta, Side Bar, and Fluxx are some of my favorite places to meet the ladies. Not sure where to go or what's hot? Just walk up and down Market, G, and F Streets and follow the noise and you will be fine. Check out the Hooters down here. Usually, there's some pretty decent talent.

Pacific Beach, referred affectionately as "PB" by the locals is a perfect place for you to practice your game. The most action in PB is on Garnet. Two huge bars dominate the scene - PB Bar and Grill and Typhoon Saloon. Get there early or be prepared to wait in line. Fred's Mexican Cafe is next door to the Typhoon if you're looking for some decent Mexican food. Check out Bob's Dive, Sinbad Cafe (which is a hooka bar that attracts groups of hot girls), or Cabo Cantina. Tavern on the Beach and Plum Crazy usually has hot girls inside, so it might be worth your time. Society is a billiards place to chill after you have met the cutie you've been looking for. Finally, Millers Field is a cool sports bar filled with girls who are way laid back and cool.

During the day, hang out on the campus of SDSU and check out the boardwalks of Mission and Pacific Beaches after 5:00 pm when the babes come out to work out. Run, bike, or rollerblade and be bold in your approach. The boardwalk is not a place for the shy and timid, it's quite difficult to strike up a conversation with someone who's riding a bike past you! Mouse's on Mission Beach offers a nice vantage point to plan your approach.

Come nighttime on Mission Beach, check out Club Tremors on Garnet and Club Sevilla. There are usually some good-looking women out and about at these places. Be careful: a lot of the women here have military boyfriends or husbands, as there is a huge US Navy base close by. You may have your wrap rudely interrupted by a pissed-off, testosterone-filled soldier who's ready to kick your ass. You may run across a "West Pac Widow", which is a wife of a navy man who is overseas for months at a time in the South Pacific. I tend to avoid the West Pac Widows - it's bad karma to try to get with a soldier's wife.

Another good thing about San Diego is that Tijuana, Mexico is just south of here. There is some serious partying that goes on across the border. The party-goers tend to be kids from San Diego who are under the US legal drinking age and are very intent on taking advantage of the fact that in Mexico if you are old enough to walk (even if you're already drunk), you are old enough to buy alcohol. But beware - don't give money to all the little kids with dirt-smudged, adorable faces selling gum or candy. Unknowing tourists can't help but shove money at them. They make a killing. Don't believe me? Watch one of those little con artists for 15 minutes and see how much money they rake in, it's incredible.

Drunk partiers who piss off Mexican police or bar proprietors have been known to get their asses tossed in jail without trial and have to pay ridiculous bribes to city officials to get out, so be careful down here! Worse yet, if you look at all Mexican you will get a load of shit when you try to come back into the United States, I guarantee it. The border police are dumb as shit, and they like to act like badasses and mess with all the returning party-goers. Don't give them a reason to mess with you. Don't give them the satisfaction. Believe me. I speak from personal experience.

I remember the time I went to Tijuana with my buddies. Being a darkie, I was paranoid that I was going to get harassed by the border patrol when I tried to get back into the country. Sure enough, even after seeing my passport, my license, and my medical school ID, they still brought me to stand before the man, as my buddies (and my brother who looks just like me) were waved through with a nod. I was accused of trying to smuggle steroids into the country and was invasively patted down. When I protested my terrible treatment, as I was leaving the agent said "I am the US border patrol. I can go inside you if I want." Now that's a God complex. Needless to say, I was out of there in a hurry and promised myself that I had just made my last trip to Tijuana. It totally wasn't worth the danger and the hassle.